Do you have other employees?

I’m sorry you’re struggling with this. One of my first employers taught me a very valuable lesson - don’t be friends with the people you work with.

1. That doesn’t mean don’t be friendly
2. It doesn’t mean you can’t be close

It does mean that you have to respect the work relationship as a special type that is different from normal friendships and relationships of choice. This is a lesson you’d do well to learn because you have a problem.

You have a moral obligation to help your friend who’s suffering greatly from mental illness. This is in direct opposition to your obligation to maintain a healthy business for yourself, clients, family and other employees. It appears as though fulfilling one of these obligations may mean you fail in the other.

I cannot tell you what to do in this situation, but wish you well as you work to resolve it. I hope you respect and honor the work relationship in the future.

Ps. Some of my closest relationships are with those who work for me, but I never “hang” or engage in purely “social” engagement and none of us would ever confuse being friendly or close with being friends.

Call a welfare check on him they may take him in for a few days for a mental evaluation maybe a diff team if therapists and docs will notice stuff he isn’t telling his own

This sounds like he might be betting burnt out. If he was a good employee up until now maybe try and see if a mental health leave could help him get back to his normal self. Maybe there are disability grants or wage subsidies you could apply for to ease the financial burden on both the business and him while he gets better and afterwards when he’s re-integrating work.

If he stays, he probably will get worse.
If you let him go, he will probaby get worse.
Mental health isnt something a “normal” person usually can understand. If you want to go the friend route, google local mental health clinic nearby, print the location and contact details out. Then have the “boss” talk with him, like, this Friday is your last day. Have the printout of help ready to give him. text it to him as well, as he likely will loose the printout.

None of us can save people until they are ready to be saved. This doesnt mean we dont “try” however it also means we have loving but firm boundaries of our own.

“he says he’s fine and denies any of it…” he cant change until he sees that this thought process is self-defeating and is denial (he might feel safe as he is, familier etc), and he has to also start to believe there is a “better” life he can live. Im sorry you are both in this situation.

As a business you need to let him go. But as a friend, you can take your personal time to maybe help line up a job for him or offer a bit of money to get him by until he finds one if you’re in a position to do so. Make sure to separate your business relationship and personal relationship if you want to remain friends or at least friendly.

This is your friend. Take him for coffee ask him whats changed or whats going on for him you may be the trigger point for the behavior change be open to his answers and listen. If it doesnt have an impact and you cannot reconnect over it tell him whats going on for you show him a personal p&l let him know hes been a big help in the past and you appreciate him. Let him know if the role doesnt interest him anymore you can still be friends and that you dont want to formally document him out of the job but cant afford the negative consequences." …moving forward we have to follow the progressive discipline system to the letter,(this means write ups down the line to termination) " if we can be in this together and do it amazing"" if youd rather not thats amazing to if youve decided parting ways is a better idea at this point i get it and it makes sense" if you can sit on it for a couple days let him know that he can have a couple of days off before he makes his decision and your happy to revisit it then. Good luck this is a shit spot for you both to be in.

I have walked in your shoes and highly commend you for giving him an opportunity.

Similarly, when I saw my guy was unable do catch on to one type of task, I moved him to a different one. Similarly, he started off ok and the quality of his work quickly crashed.

My last effort was to create a punch list of tasks and in what order he should do them and can check off as they were completed. In my situation, this back-fired because he became so overwhelmed by the list of tasks, it “paralyzed” him.

When I shared this issue & my frustration his with a friend, he said it sounded like I’d done my best to create an opportunity but asked me if I’m running a charity or a business.

I let my guy with 2 weeks severance.

When you let someone go who has mental health issues, they take the termination poorly and are shocked.

If you think a detailed punch list of tasks can help your guy, give it a shot, but make it clear, in writing, if his work quality does improve consistently ove r the next 5 days, you’ll have to let him go. At the very least, he may be able to better comprehend the situation in writing that his work is poor, what needs to improve, in what time frame and what the outcome will be.

You’re doing yourself and your business a disservice. Unless you’re already a multi millionaire with a clear retirement path, you’d better lose this guy and look out for your self. That sounds shitty but as a failed business owner because I was “too nice”, I’m telling you get your shit together and run your place like a business and not a charity.

This guy is lying to doctors, he’s probably lying to you. He’s off his meds or lost interest. If he’s not looking out for himself, you can’t help him. He needs to be honest with the people who can help him, you and the doctors. Until he helps himself, others can’t.

Stop losing clients and money over this. At a 6K loss, you could have housed and fed the guy instead.

He’s using drugs. 1/4 of all people are addicts. 1/100,000 have schizophrenia.

Mental health, particularly a psychosis like schizophrenia, is not like many chronic physical issues in that once you reach an optimal pharmacological threshold that it’s well managed for years with minimal symptoms.

There are peaks and troughs to the symptoms experienced by the individual and often prescribers will have to adjust dosages or add medications to their regimens.

My advice is this: If he’s a valuable resource and employee when his symptoms are well managed I’d suggest giving his prescriber and medication time to adjust. Neuro chemical changes in the brain can take months to produce positive impacts as neuro plasticity is a months-long process.

Give him time. Don’t fire him. Productivity is important yes humanity has a place in business too.

It is a buissness, you should fire him. Let him know he can come back when he figures things out.

You know this. You are looking for our permission.

You have permission to fire your mentality disabled friend.

If you care, you can send him a few hundred every week. It will be cheaper for you to gift him money. Think about what he has already cost you.