It should hurt a little, actually. Every time you fire someone, you have failed in some capacity - recruitment, strategic or leadership wise.

That being said, I have always four things in mind when doing it:

1. If you hired them, you fire them. Do it in person and be honest. Tell them why it is happening.

2. It should almost never be a surprise. If it isn’t because of a serious issue like stealing or anything in that area, you should’ve provided feedback and had talks that made them see what was coming. If it was because of a culture/honesty problem, you should be as clear as possible to your team about what is tolerated and what isn’t. That makes the talk much easier.

3. Most times people, even if they know they aren’t a right fit, won’t have the guts to just leave. I’ve known multiple people that being fired from a place where they weren’t happy and couldn’t grow was the best thing that ever happened to their professional lives. It might actually be good for them in the long run.

4. My commitment it to the team and the ones that stay. It isn’t fair that I jeopardize their jobs and the future jobs the business might create for fear of having a hard conversation. It’s selfish.

Fire yourself first (internally). Because you failed at hiring. Then rebuild yourself. Move on.

It’s almost impossible.

Even a team member I really struggled with - still felt bad. Even when I was threatened after firing her. 😞

Don’t think of it as firing someone. Think of it as saving everyone else. The health of the firm demands it. Too bad, let them down as easy as you can, but they have to go.

You should watch “Up In The Air” a movie about a guy who fires people for a living. You might even get his speech by heart.

Imagine if we had an actual social safety net, so firing someone didn’t mean putting them in such a potentially dire situation. That’s why you feel guilty. You know that this person will now be at far greater risk of losing their home, having medical bills they can’t afford, and many other things that honestly shouldn’t be a consequence of losing your job. Remember this feeling and vote for policies that take care of working people, so that firing someone doesn’t mean royally screwing them.

I had to fire a 30 year old employee that was diagnosed with an aggressive cancer and also had a new born baby. Great person, good employee. I thought of him as a friend and I cried for the first time in years. At the end of the day, keeping him was severely detrimental to my business and finances. He could no longer do the job and was gone 3 days a week. I had to choose my family over his situation and that’s how I coped.

Yes firing someone can be difficult, but the mindset shift for you is this actually has very little to do with you. This is not an arbitrary decision at all. This person is not working out for specific and clear reasons and part of your job is ensuring the organization is being run properly. Feeling guilty is when you believe you have done something wrong or acted with malice in some way. That simply is not the case, as you’ve described it. Certainly, you can show empathy towards this person when you have the conversation, but the mind shift is mentally understanding the difference between feeling guilt (you have not done anything ‘wrong’) and empathy (you care about this person’s well being).

Good luck!

I have to fire someone, similar to your situation. My attorney advised that I send her an email and end all contact.

My advice is to remember this isn’t all about you and how you feel. This is about them and their future. In situations like this I like to think I’m doing them a favor and that now they will be able to find a job that suits them a lot better.

Getting fired doesn’t necessarily have to be a bad thing. It can open doors of opportunity and growth for someone in ways they never imagined, even though right now it may not seem that way. You have to believe that firing them will improve their life and career over the long haul.

Firing someone suck unless they self sabotage. Not seeing it coming bothers me - if it’s that bad of an incident they should have been let go immediately. If not, it should have been documented, discussed, and a plan to remediate put in place IMO

Makes me feel great getting rid of employees that aren’t worth a shit. All they are doing is taking money out of my pocket.

You dont, it sucks…everytime. but it’s business and if you have other employees you have to look after them and even if you don’t, it’s just business

This is business It has nothing to do with the person, it is the problem that matters. The employee may still feel rejected and bad, but you are letting them go for the business. A business is viewed legally as an independent entity. You need to see it the same way. It’s like a loved one in a coma. You speak for it and do your best to do what is best for it

If you ask me, id suggest a disciplinary write up or something, unless the issue the employee did makes you fire him on the spot.

My guilt over the same thing was eased recently when said employee showed up 2 1/2 hours late for his shift, when we were waiting for him to fire him. He had been slacking so hard for so long!!!