Not asking for legal advice here, more how to handle things emotionally.

Long story short, we started a joint venture with another company last year and they stiffed us on payment and walked off with the IP we built. I won’t go into details, but they’ve got deeper pockets than us, and are trying to intimidate us into walking away.

I’ve got lawyers working on it, and we’re taking all the steps to handle it well. But fuckingdamn if it’s not an emotional load. Sleepless nights, angry days, the works.

While I’m hopeful we’ll have a good outcome (we were solid about documenting everything), it looks like it’ll be a long road.

I’m using it as a solid learning curve. But: How have you guys handled similar situations emotionally? Especially when it looks like it’ll take another 1 - 2 years to sort out. Feels like it’s taken the wind out of my sails.

[Edit: Grammar]

  • straponmyjobhat@alien.topB
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    10 months ago

    I feel you on this. I got really emotionally burned like this twice in my career. Now:

    1. I am extremely careful not get myself in these situations. That means being through in communication and maintaining control of IP until both sides are happy.

    2. I put a high price tag on my mental wellbeing and realize that a legal fight costs me a lot of pain with lost sleep and stress. That’s worth half my salary at least.

    Always remember that lawyers WANT you to fight because that’s how they make money. They are incentivized to aim as high as possible for you. They win either way, but will win more the more you fight.

    Most lawyers won’t account for the cost to your mental state that a fight tolls. Sometimes that’s worth much more than the money you’d win, especially when you subtract their bills.

    Don’t fall into this legal battle trap. Focus on your business and work on things that make you happy. Learn your lesson and move on.

    You were brilliant enough to create something great before. You’ll do it again.

    • wellthatwasashock@alien.topOPB
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      10 months ago

      I appreciate it, and the whole lawyer thing is something I’ve very much been learning. They like the concept of shooting for the moon. It’s too bad, would love to find some legal teams that didn’t think like that, but it is their job.

      And to your numbered points: yuuuup. I’m absolutely nailing down our contracts and procedures, and being much more skeptical about who we work with.

      And genuinely: thanks for taking the time, and the kind words at the end there. I appreciate it.

  • Additional-Sock8980@alien.topB
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    10 months ago

    Don’t let it distract you from the mission. I’ve walked away on legal fights I’d certainly win, because no one tells you how much attention, time and opportunity cost it will take.

    Lawyers alway tell you to purse it - it’s how they make their money.

    If you decide to do it, put time in the diary to work on it and refuse to think about it the rest of the time. It’s mentally draining. Give the lawyers the info and let them at it.

    Mostly take learnings from it now, payment always upfront or in stages, build in fail safes. JV contacts need to be solid. They probably had you in the small print. See if your lawyer can negotiate a win win settlement early without dragging it out.

    Legal battles are an annoying but just part of the entrepreneurial journey, after a while they stop phasing you, but the first few really take up rental space in your mind. Unfortunately if you have success or money, people will try to take it from you.

    • wellthatwasashock@alien.topOPB
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      10 months ago

      Thanks. This is good advice, and I appreciate you taking the time.

      Yeah. Realizing it’s just part of the journey has been helpful. Makes the whole thing feel less devastating, and more like just another business challenge to figure out.

      But man if it isn’t hard on the old ego.

      Again. Thanks.

  • ck256-2000@alien.topB
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    10 months ago

    Pick yourself up and build the next thing while this sorts itself out. What else can you control?

    • Yolobabyshark247@alien.topB
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      10 months ago

      This happened to me. And I did exactly that. I’m waiting for the other company to run out of funds (they’re grant funded). But I’ll have my new thing which keeps going

  • StepheninVancouver@alien.topB
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    10 months ago

    Legal battles are part of business but the first time is the scariest and most stressful. Try to distance yourself from the personal aspect and think of it as a game two parties are playing with the object of winning money because that’s essentially what it is.

    You will learn from the experience and next time it will be much easier

  • shadeville82@alien.topB
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    10 months ago

    I completely understand you and exactly how you are feeling. This is a thing where you must put your emotions aside and keep creating. That is extremely hard but it is possible! Creating something new and working on it constantly helps a bunch. Time will fly by as lawsuits will take time, but your motivation will build because you have something new you are working on and watching it develop even if it is just a small presentation or beginning of a business plan. I speak from direct experience…, in fact if it makes you feel better, your not alone or the only one. I am currently going through the exact same thing, I created a revolutionary technology that creates a completely new industry using a mobile phone. I created it and worked on it 12 years, brought a partner in 10 years ago, got screwed over (I was not vigilant and paying attention to my stomach), partner ran off with the IP along with turning every investor against me and destroying my reputation in the industry we were building off of to enter the new niche with my technology. I lost 2.5 million in shares and am owed a few hundred thousand, to dead broke and rebuilding again (this is recent). This does happen, and you have to stay strong and keep creating. I took my time out to write you because I deeply feel you regarding your situation! Nothing like someone who is knows what your going through. Work on something new like I am doing myself.

    • wellthatwasashock@alien.topOPB
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      10 months ago

      Hey! I so appreciate you taking the time to message me. Mine is a fraction of the time and size, so I can barely imagine how you’re feeling.

      That sounds very wise, and makes a lot of sense. I think part of it is getting over the sense of loss, and realizing that if you’ve built something once — you can build something else valuable again. But man is it a kick in the stomach.

      I hope your situation turns out well. But I’m very glad to hear that you’re finding ways to move through it. I’ll absolutely take that input. Thanks again!

      • shadeville82@alien.topB
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        10 months ago

        No problem! These things happen unfortunately but the real value is in your creative imagination, your mind. We all fall down and get back up again. Even if that company seems as strong as an oak tree, remember that tree can produce millions of match sticks, but with time and patience, one of those match sticks can burn down that entire tree. You can always rebuild and most importantly, continue to create. Karma is very real, for motivation, look at the lost “and found again” interview of Steve Jobs… Take care!

  • OriginalOk4951@alien.topB
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    10 months ago

    You asked on how to handle things emotionally so I’m going to stick to that. First of all, I tell your from experience, do whatever you can to not dedicate more time to this than whats needed. Dont stop building your next business/idea. When I went through something like this therapy and exercise really helped me. This is a great lesson you have learned for the future. New and greater things will come in your future.

  • Banksville@alien.topB
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    10 months ago

    We r gearing up to sue someone we hired. Worked for us 10+ years. Made mistakes, took $, etc. we r well documented too & we wonder WHY would they want to go court? But, I’ve learned court can be fickle (the judge). But, principle is also worth fighting for. GLTU!

  • thughes84@alien.topB
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    10 months ago

    Agreed with the comments here.

    That said, I’d get their personal address and light a bag of shit on fire, leave it on their porch. Until the case is complete.

    If you win, you’ve won on the porch and in court. If you lose, you still won on the porch.

  • AskFelix@alien.topB
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    10 months ago

    Not all lawsuits will be done in 2 years. Some take 5-6 years (personal experience). I’m sure you got other things in the works. Dust yourself off and keep grinding.