Okay, so I know the clickbait-y title was a bit cringe. I’m 27, I’ve been a real estate agent for 3 years now after dropping out of college, and managed to bring myself up into the “luxury” market of real estate in that time. I’ll make just below $300k this year, which I think is pretty decent in this current economy of the US. My issue is, and I’m hoping many of you in this sub will be able to advise, is that I’m having an extremely hard time finding like-minded men to surround myself with. As mentioned, I just turned 27, I make 6 figures, in the gym at 5:30 6 days a week, got the nice car, etc, etc, etc. Now a lot of my clients I would consider friends, but they are all in their 40’s+, so not exactly my IMMEDIATE friends, I guess. My main friend group consists of the guys I’ve remained in contact with since high school or college, who are already acting like their retired and spending all their free time doing absolutely fuck-all, inviting me out to the clubs/bars at 10pm or later Thursday-Sunday, have ugly gf’s, talk about how nice it is that their job is wfh allowing them to play video games and watch Netflix the majority of the day, etc.
I honestly feel like I’m going crazy. I’m thinking of business ideas 24/7. I’m constantly looking for the next venture. I wake up extra early to watch Bloomberg before I start my day. I’m sure many of the men on this sub have similar mindsets, are you always this lonely? Do you always feel this isolated and individualized? If not, what type of efforts and where did you meet your “tribe”? I would do anything to be able to have someone to bounce ideas off of, or even start some new venture together, but I feel so isolated in my ambition.
You should just stop trying. The only thing that matters is money, so why are you looking for friends? Just continue to work, make money, watch Andrew Tate videos, and deal with the fact that your ego and income makes you better than everyone else. There’s no other way. Stop pursuing relationships, whether platonic or romantic, maybe one day you can program a robot to be your super successful friend. Put up or shut up
You seem like an asshole.
I think you need to make yourself more enjoyable to be around.
You’re 27 and make $300k; it’s a world of its own really. I’m 33 in a similar tax bracket right now(but this is new for me), and I’m complacent AF, but slowly working into what I want for life. I also eat Taco Bell at least once a week.
I don’t have a tribe, but I have a wife, a dog, and hopefully a kid soon. As I get older, I get more distant, and priorities change. Focus on your hobbies, and find a passion outside of your work. Make friends through a mindset outside of money. Pick up fly fishing, big game hunting, skeet shooting, golfing or something. Buy a boat. Use your money and go live.
Broaden your scope of friends. If you just stick with other 27yo guys, you’ll be lucky to find anyone like you.
My friends range in age from 40’s to 90’s, both men and woman. All incredible people who are going after their best lives and super funny.
If I went for people who were like me and my age/ gender, I would have zero friends.
Hey man - I get where you’re coming from. I’ve been on a similar path/grind over the last 3 years (albeit not as succesful as yours yet), but one thing I found particularly hard is not having someone in my group of friends to lean on, learn from, share with and so on…
It’s been tough and lonely. I enjoy having beers & going out with them, but feel as though I’m ‘wasting’ my time away, Time I could be using to gain financial freedom & provide for my parents, sisters & aunt. I feel as though it’s a lot of pressure at times. Also feel like time is slipping away FAST… i’m in my late twenties.
Keep being mindful of balancing your time spent socially / personally vs professionally / business. Being rich & alone probably won’t satisfy 30 years down the line.
Hang in there bud ! Free to chat if ever !
I think you might have a personality issue.
About me: I work from home, I make 6-figures, I have a beautiful girlfriend. So… that means I’m a “winner”. Yay for me…
Dude, seeing the world like that just comes off as extremely unconfident. Let people live life the way they want to. If they invite you to bars from Thursday to Sunday, go only on Saturday. This is a good thing. They invite you. Go when you want. Let them go when they want.
Finding “winner” friends is not going to suddenly turn you into a billionaire. And even if it did, do you think you would be happier? You make a lot of money without having gone to college. You have friends that invite you to hang out several days a week, and you call them “losers”. Stopping judging people and live life the way you want to. But also, let people live their own lives as well.
Why do you view people as either “winners” or “losers”? So you can arbitrarily put yourself in the “winner” category? Let me ask you something: are you happy? I honestly hope you are, but after reading this post… I don’t think so.
too busy to feel lonely. (joking)
i’ve had reasonable success, now i’m just focusing on building up passive income streams that can free up my time. to be honest, i don’t want to fill that now freed up time with more work, but with family and chill stuff that i like.
my dad was like you, and he’s crazy successful, but ultimately had 3 divorces and now that hes entering retirement hes in somewhat of a panic, he has no hobbies or interests other than work, his relationships are a mess, his friendships only revolve around work meaning when he stops they also stop being relevant, too much of his identity and who he is is tide to his work, and since covid, even that has contracted (F&B), now hes struggling with what might be his legacy.
the point is, i get your ambitious, successful and want that, but also, dont forget to just relax and enjoy life and appreciate what you have and the non-material successes.
Dude, you’re in your 20s making 300k a year. Go out to some fucking clubs and live a little.
You have friends w/ ugly GF’s… you’re a loser
But ugly girlfriends are loyal and easy to gaslight
Did you tell your friends that their GFs are ugly? If not, you’re not being true to yourself. Speak your mind and tell them.
you can pay for a mastermind group. many out there.
I don’t think the problem is your existing friends, I think the problem is that you have a hard time making new friends (otherwise, wouldn’t’ you have made some new friends apart from the guys you already knew by now?).
Maybe work on the other aspects of yourself besides the ‘hustle-n-grind’ part. Successful people want to be friends with multidimensional, educated, refined, worldly, affable, outgoing people, not boring guys who let their careers own them.
Yes that will happen when you really dedicate yourself to something. It’s normal. A lot of my friends are more concerned about social events than I care to be. However, I still try to be social with some friends.
What throws me off about your post is that you’re “thinking of business ideas 24/7”. I imagine it’s because my business takes more mental focus than average, but frankly I don’t have the time to entertain new business ideas all day when I am spending so much time on my current one. I do have a few other ideas but now is not a good time to delve deep into them. I did do a networking event with several other entrepreneurs; they all read lots of books and asked me the latest book I read. I couldn’t imagine spending time reading business books all week. But again, I am not working on a quick app or product that one could build in six months. Just my two cents.
Go do 3.5-4 grams of mushrooms alone with eye-shades and ANC headphones on and then report back.