Hey all,

I’m 2 months full time into a startup and there’s just no other way to say it: my wife hates it. Hates that I don’t have an income, that I’m taking this risk, that I’ll need to spend some $$, etc.

That said, I already made a plan with her that outlines timeline and budget needed to build this thing, but it hasn’t helped (seemingly).

Has anyone experienced something similar, and how did you resolve it? It’s so toxic I’ve made the conscious decision to stop talking to her about it to protect myself, and I certainly don’t want things to get worse.

Thanks in advance.

  • atcg0101@alien.topBEnglish
    1·
    10 months ago

    My 2 cents:

    Building a startup is something a family takes a risk on together, even if only one of the parents/spouses are actively working on it day to day.

    It sounds like you were ready to take this risk and jump into it, but your wife was not. Ultimately you need her buy in if you don’t want this experience to build contempt in your relationship. Contempt is poisonous to any relationship, and the fact that you’re fighting and now not even talking about it likely creates an environment that fosters contempt.

    A framework to address challenges together is vital to the success and well-being of any relationship (marriage, co-founders, siblings, teammates, etc). You all have a challenge in-front of you. It may be helpful to have a conversation that addresses not only what is important for each of you as individuals, but equally, if not more, important from the perspective of what is best for your relationship.

    OP, you may have to be ready to accept the reality that your wife is not ready to take this leap. There’s also a chance she is but she will need support in a different way than you will need it as the person day-to-day in it.

    Just remember, she’s your partner and you’re in this and everything together.